Hello Kitty Floor Mats

I have a problem: my girlfriend is a Kittyaholic.

About five years ago we moved to Tokyo to teach English in a fairly prestigious school in Tokyo. Until then she'd been a completely sane individual, surprisingly immune to all things pink and girly. After one week in Tokyo, though, she came home with a fluffy pink keychain carrying the image of a cute cartoon cat.

"What's that?" I asked, not realising that this was just the beginning of a lifelong obsession.

"I don't know, but this face seems to be everywhere. Hi Kitty or something."

Flash forward five years and we're living in Bangkok. Hello Kitty merchandise fills our small studio apartment, and just recently it has begun to colonise our car. We have Hello Kitty fluffy dice, a Hello Kitty handbrake cover and Hello Kitty seat covers. Wherever I look I see that blank, staring, beady eyed kitten staring back at me.

This morning I had to draw the line. Money is pretty tight right now. The two of us have been out of work for a couple of months while the school we work for builds a customer base, and we're living off what little I can earn by writing online content for a few clients. This amounts to around $25 a day, so you can understand that it doesn't leave much to spare for treats (even accounting for the low cost of living in Thailand).

So we're shopping for essentials this morning at the local Big C and my better half sees a set of Hello Kitty floor mats. She picks them up immediately and goes to place them in the trolley. I shook my head and gently reminded her that we barely have enough money to afford breakfast. It makes no sense to spend $20 on a set of floor mats (hell, our car already has floor mats).

So she replaces the mats on the shelf and we resume shopping. She seems jumpy, though,and on edge. She can't concentrate on the shopping, and I find her staring into space.

"What's wrong?"

"... Huh? Oh... nothing. Where's the milk?"

"Honey, you're holding the milk."

"... Oh... Oh, yeah."

"Hon, are you still thinking about the Hello Kitty floor mats?"

"What? No! Nooooo. No... Yes."

"Do you want to buy them?"

"No! Noooooo. No, I know we can't really afford them. We have to be sensible. Sensib... Damn it! Yes, I want them."

"OK then, hon. We can buy the floor mats. It's OK. It's gonna... It's gonna be OK."

She gives me a wan smile, wanders back to the mats and hugs them until we reach the checkout.

I've lost my love to Hello Kitty car accessories. Pity me.